Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Stereotypes. :/

So at school today while we had a class (in which were doing doing absolutely pointless crap) my 'friends' started talking about gay stereotypes.

Not being very... intelligent (couldn't think of a better word to describe them) they of course think that the sort of gays they see on TV and in movies are accurate...

We've all seen them - they show massive flamers with a swish in their walk and a soft gay lisp, who wear flamboyant clothing and get jobs as hardressers, clothes designers or doing make-up.

Think about it - most gay characters in the media are shown in an incredibly stereotypical way. Unfortunately it almost brainwashes ordinary people into pegging us down as a 'sort' and disliking us.

I don't like that.

I also think that's the way we are shown is very untrue. A LOT of the gay people that i've met through my blog say that they AREN'T like that. I also know more than a few who've said they really dislike the massive gay flamers.

So don't you think that sucks?

We need more positive gay role models, who can be out there and not acting more girly than a girl. What we really need are just some gay 'normal' people, because let's face it, it would help our image...

And not make some poor young struggling kids think that they'll turn into 'that'.

Everyone should be free to be who they want to be. Effeminate guys can be effeminate if they want to. I just don't think that it is the most accurate depiction of gays, and we should be shown in a different, more positive light.

And of course, we wouldn't be on the receiving end of soooooo many gay jokes that have become the norm...



Saying all that... the truth is that i'm fairly 'gay' in real life... haha

And to be honest, i really like effeminate boys as well. I think high-pitched voices are really cute, and of course you all know that i like longer hair.

That's just me though. And i still don't think that we should all be shown that way.



Not all publicity is good publicity in our queer plight.

I truly think that having some good gay role-models would be a big step forward in more acceptance and understanding.

Spill your guts in the comments, especially if you can think of some positive gay figures that are out there.

===>mirrorboy<===

27 comments:

Poisoned Happiness said...

You can be positive gay figure :) Seriously, as you said you are not falling into stereotypes, and you are out at school, so you can show that you are nothing like guys your friends described.
I heard about some news reporters or presenters from various TV stations and politicians, mostly from USA, that are openly gay and they are not falling into that stereotype for sure.

Planetx_123 said...

I completely agree. I actually did two papers in college on this. One on gay characters in film and one in television. Doing the research for the television paper, was interesting because then (and probably still now) there was not a single sit-com that had a good representation of gay people. One of the biggest things of interest to me was Will and Grace (which I love btw). On the show it wasn't until the last few seasons that Will had a real relationship. The claim was that by Will and Grace living together, it was just another comfortable/accessible heterosexual relationship that viewers could ingest....and then of course there was Jack, the stereotypical gay that everyone can laugh at. So while the producers/writers (some of whom were gay) were trying to create a gay friendly show, they had mixed success. They got a show with more real gay characters than had been on primetime before, but still had strange concessions to make in order for the show to be acceptable to a mainstream audience.

Anyways- the only other thing that I want to say is: alot of people (at least in america, I don't know about anywhere else) view gays as ONLY sexually promiscuous, drug using, sexual/social deviants. This is primarily due to the negative stereotypes that have been shoved down everyones throat- plus the awful portrayal of gay people in 70's and early 80's news (see Dan Rather's CBS news special from the 70s, its despicable). However, this has nothing to do with gay people. Both gay and straight people party, do drugs, and are sexually promiscuous. Both gay and straight people make bad decisions, and are getting AIDS. This has nothing to do with being homosexual, it has to do with being immature and making bad choices. I love that Girls Gone Wild is out there, because it perfectly demonstrates that sexual debauchery has nothing to do with sexual orientation. I actually got my dad to agree with this, over a long conversation one day. I never told him I was gay, but I suspect that he probably knew as my mom probably does as well.

Anyways- I agree that good role models would be nice, but I think|hope that the stereotypes are less prominent with each generation. Hopefully in 50 years, this will be gone, and our childrens' children can grow up with less hate and injustice.

Much Love,
Steve

Jake Annonymous said...

Did you not once say you like the feel of womens clothing?

Brother

exalen said...

Stereotypes always take a long time to break down. It's up to courageous people to lead the charge and show people a differet perspective.

As a writer this could be something you can contribute to. You already have Coltrane!

Great art, and even some bad art, has the power to make people think differently. I know that my attitude, and understanding, of gay people changed when I was 14 and I saw the Gregg Araki movie Totally F@#ked Up.

As Capt'n Planet used to say, The Power Is Yours! ;-)

Anonymous said...

Hi there - another interesting post as usual. I'd say there are plenty of interesting gay role models who do not fit the "Mardi Gras" stereotype - to start with, about 90% of all gay people *grin*

(and its awful to paint all Mardi Gras people with the same brush but hey, its a descriptive I'll use for now) :)

Realistically many people spring to mind - Stephen Fry, John Gielgud, Richard Burton, Ian McKellen ... not sure why I am only thinking of actors ! but anyway, you get the idea.

Its a mix - you need loud types (we all have girly moments), you need activists, you need home bodies, business men, politicians, doctors, actors - and gay people are represented amongst each segment of society. People like Billie Armstrong (Greenday) openly talk about their (bi)sexuality and he certainly does not fit any stereotype. Leonard Bernstein also springs to mind. Joel Spolsky (part of Microsoft development team) is also an interesting character who has discussed his sexuality a fair bit.

For most of these people, their sexuality is *not* a main stay of their lives - often, the flamboyance of the public image of the Mardi-Gras gay is their own outing of their sexuality as a badge of honour. For most of us, it is just a 'normal' part of who we are and we want to get on with our lives without drawing special attention in high heels and makeup.

The image of a gay person in the public mind and the condemnation that it tends to generate (sequines, lisp, promiscuity, disease, drugs etc) stopped me from coming out until I was in my late teens because I couldn't view myself as "that". Only when I became an adult (well, old teen) did I realise you could be whatever you wanted and create your own view of reality!

Best of luck.

M

exalen said...

PS: Ian McKellan is gay and a great actor. He played Magneto in X-Men and Gandalf in Lord Of The Rings.

One of my fave actors.

mirrorboy said...

@Jake. WTF? NO.

And Ian McKellen is awesome.

I was going to mention my Coltrane character as well but i figured that you would have had enough of me going on about that by now. :P

===>mirrorboy<===

.//Kyros said...

i like long hair on guys too!!( i have a story for that as well) but anyway, i completely agree. the stereotypes you see on Tv make me a little sad inside. unfortunately, i do know people who act like that, and some of them are ok. but some are not. i believe being gay opens you to a different perception if you will. it allows you to see all sides of issues, no matter who the issue is with. on the other hand, once you get too far onto the stereotypical side of it, you use that ability close-mindedly, or just plain wrong. i won first place in a singing competition and this pair of guys were so stereotypically gay, it was annoying. they were talking about the faults of other people, degrading them in every way. i thought they were sickening. i see what you are saying, we need more role modules to help us find our way.

Steevo said...

m-boy... so what if you DID say you liked the feel of women's clothing? It's not common, but even some str8 men like it.

So what if some gay boys are "sissies" or "girly"?? So what if some are emo twinks? Or cubs?

An old fat queen who dresses in sequins and army boots has a right to our respect as much as any other gay person. So he looks odd or makes someone uncomfortable?

When we wish there were more "normal" role models, we fall into the very trap you claim to hate. What's "normal"? Who decides?

If we as gay men believe in full rights and respect for ALL gay people, well m-boy my young friiend, that includes ALL gay people. Period. Wishing that the swishy guy or the hairy leather daddy were not so visible so that all the str8s would not think ill of us is buying into homophobia. Can we exclude all the "atypical" not str8acting gays from public view? Well, maybe that's the logical conclusion of your position. If being gay is OK, being gay anyway u wanna is OK! Maybe not convenient, or pleasant to behold, but gay is gay. The twink hasta support the bear who hasta support the [gay]cross-dresser who hasta support the 300# queen, etc.

There was a time when a Black man HAD to cross the street if a white woman was walking towards him. The women did not want to be so close to a negro! It made her uncomfortable! Poor thing.

Now that man can be president of th USA!!! XD

If I seem harsh, I am sorry. I do not mean to. In some ways, this is very subtle self-internalized homophobia. It hapens to be a pet peeve of mine.


steevo
.
.

mirrorboy said...

Shit Steevo. I didn't mean for it to come across that way!

Seriously. I feel that i am girly and quite effeminate. I fit into the 'gay' stereotype more than many of you. So i definitely didn't want to insult my type.

I'm all for acceptance of everyone. What i'm not for, is everyone thinking that all gays are drag queens or such and such because it only makes it worse for us.

Now, there's nothing wrong with drag queens. I love drag queens. I just don't like stereotypes. I want you all to understand that i'm against stereotypes, not stereotypical people.

I just felt the need to defend myself. I've always felt that i was an incredibly accepting person (and still do) so calling me phobic in any way is something i have to face.

I hope i cleared that up a bit. :/

I'm happy to clarify more if you want to.

Doomed but cheerful! said...

Well, for what it's worth, some of us have camped it up, or walked the closet straight and narrow, for years in every walk of life (I spent a long time blowing stuff up - my sexuality never featured in the interview for the job). Not all of us identify with the classical 'Village People' types, which confuses the bejeesus out of some. Tough. And some guys who f*ck other guys are not that keen on being labelled 'gay', preferring 'queer' - and some don't even like labels.
Frankly, if we could all treat each other as individuals, and learn about the person, and not the label, there would be a lot less bigotry, a lot less shrieking, and we could just get on with living. Or perhaps I am just very tired of 'militant this' and 'militant that'.
Of course, I have always walked softly (and carried a big stick).
So, in short, drop the labels, and that includes 'ordinary people' - as my old headmaster used to say, "You are all unique, just like everbody else."

AJCon89 said...

I agree with you that it sucks that some people think off all gays as big queens... but that is how stereotypes work.. and not just gay stereotypes.

The stereotypical Jew is a big nosed money grubbing guy who speaks like he just got off the boat from eastern europe....

the stereotypical black is a gangster/rapper who is a thug and criminal...

the stereotypical irish guy is a red headed drunk...

the stereotypical polish guy is some dumb idiot

the stereotypical italian is a mobster...

and the list can go on and on...

that is what stereotyping is about. you find the most outrageous thing about a group and apply that to all people...

There are very few good stereotypes out there... period.

I think its something that just isnt going to change because it is part of what humans are. Sure, we can become more accepting and loving... but to try to wipe out a characteristic of the human race is scary to me... i reeks of mind control... lol

Plus stereotyping has made for some amazing comedy... if chris rock didnt make a stereotype out of blacks AND whites, then his act would basically be pointless and unfunny. but because he did... it s fucking hysterical... imo.

What good would have the sopranos been without the italian stereotype? it would have been a bunch of guys working at their offices...

even the office... a great show... is based of the stereotype of white guys who are just so uncool.

I just think that as a community we need to be less sensitive to these things and realize that this is the way it is for everyone... i think we need to have thicker skin about these types of things.

I know many of you will disagree with me... but its what i believe.

eh.. whatever...

Bring the beating on... because i know most people disagree with me on this one.

Peace,
AJ

"zesim"

Kevin Wilson said...

I think they gay stereotype makes it harder for the gay community to achieve the aims it works so hard for.

I am 42 years old and I am gay but you wouldn't know it if you met me, unless gaydar is an actual "thing" we have.

The gays that we see in TV shows are an embarrassing extreme that gives the general public the wrong idea about gay people in general. If I had to pick a character from a TV show that defies the public perception of gays I would have to say it was the Will character from Will And Grace while the Jack character reinforced the stereotype.

One of the worst things I feel that damages the idea that gay people are as normal as straight people is the Sydney Gay/Lesbian Mardi Gras - how can you take the gay movement seriously when they demand equal treatment for 364 days a year then destroy it with a stupid stereotype parade on the 365th day?

Gay people are more accepted in society now than they were when I was a teen so it should be easier in some ways for them to cast off the stereotype and be gay without all the trappings.

And no, I am not a dirty old perv reading gay teen blogs.

naturgesetz said...

Good post, mirrorboy.

What I would want to say has already been said.

I'm not out publicly, and I probably won't ever be; but I agree that when non-stereotypical gay people are out, it helps break the stereotype.

"coleav"

Mr. HCI said...

Stereotypes can definitely be damaging and not entirely to straights. I remember thinking when I was 14 that I couldn't be gay because I listened to "such tough music" (I was, and still am to a degree, a metalhead). When I got to college and there were actual people there who were known to be homosexual, the ones who appeared in articles in the student papers were always stereotypical and I knew I wasn't like that so, therefore, I couldn't be gay.

In the 70s, when I was a teen, there was one regular gay character on a TV show: Jodie Dallas on Soap. I loved the show when I was younger (we used to watch it as a family every week) and I've been finally re-watching it on DVD lately and Jodie is amazing. For one thing, in a cast of insane characters, he was one of the few "normal" people (the only others being Benson, Billy Tate and Mary Campbell). Billy Crystal's portrayal was also fantastic; Jodie was a real person, not a cardboard cutout. To be fair, almost all of the characters were very real or the show wouldn't have worked.

Just about any other gay character I saw on TV or in the movies was a villain. Gays are sick, after all, so they must all be bad, evil people.

Thankfully, things have definitely changed for the better, in general.

Stereotypes do suck and are often harmful; there are usually going to be at least some people, however, from whatever group that do fit the stereotype.

We definitely need more non-stereotypical role models out there for gay youth but that doesn't mean we should be ashamed of folks that fit gay stereotypes. We're a broad spectrum but, unfortunately, the media inevitably latches on to only the outrageous people for coverage and the media have the power to present us however they please. The only way we can combat that is by being out and showing the world that we're more diverse than the media present us to be.

One of the additional problems in the gay community, IMO, is a lot of folks when they first come out feel they have to act a part to "fit in" rather than just be themselves. Then again, that's human nature, I guess. Regardless, not acting gay enough actually cost me a couple of friends many years ago.

Seth said...

m-boy: I got exactly what you mean, I think.

One thing that has always disturbed me, and having been indirectly involved with it for so long - is "Gay Pride" - I'm specifically referring to the annual Gay Pride (March/Parade) in New York City. *some mentioned Mardi Gras also similar*.

First, people call it the Gay Pride PARADE. Its origins were as a (political/social) protest/demonstration MARCH. A march has a purpose. It gets people out on the streets to further a cause. A PARADE is just that - a big spectacle aimlessly wandering down the street.

Somewhere along the way, the NYC GP event switched to a Parade - and to this day, its nothing more than a huge spectacle and display of feathers (pardon the pun).

Every year, I watch the television news coverage of the event. Every year, I am disappointed. They show the SAME STEREOTYPES over and over. The "drag queen". The "leather man". The "twink in underoos" and the "muscle-bound gym-bunny" gyrating in fashion label swim trunks. Maybe a shot of a lesbian with a child, or an elderly activist plastered with buttons (I swear, they have like a special platoon of those old guys wearing 300 buttons, no matter WHAT kind of subject event LOL), maybe a shot of the street filled with REVELERS. The street is / was supposed to be filled with PROTESTORS or Demonstrators, not cotton-candy vendors.

We've lost touch with gay pride and the reasons it exists.

Part of the reason is because the only thing people see is that one moment, and not the reason people were out in the streets in the first place.

We're PROUD to be gay, but to show how proud we are, we SEPERATE and ISOLATE ourselves from "normal".

Imagine what an impact a gay pride march/parade would have, if the streets were filled with every-day working joes. Men and women who just looked like they were on their way to work, or to play tennis, or to go to the museum, just plain average people. THAT would show society what I think you were getting at, which is that we need more "normal" representations of gay people.

I heard about something the other week, that a school had a rally event with a scandalous title (I can't remember the whole story now) that promised people some crazy gay people doing "gay" things on the campus quad, but turned out to be a bunch of gay students doing everyday things like: studying, hanging out, reading books, talking, walking around. It struck me that wow - this is a great way to fight stereotypes - by showing people that the biggest stereotype of gay people should be:

We are just like everyone else. We are your friends, neighbors, co-workers, people sitting next to you on the bus, people working at the store you're shopping at, the guy in the next bowling lane....

Now, just a disclaimer, I also believe fully that the more extravagant stereotypes are OK, everyone is allowed to be who they want to be, and everyone should be equally accepted as unique individuals. (But too often I think people conform to, or go out of their way to conform to, the same stereotypes they also claim to dislike).

Oh, and for the record, I don't fit into any category either. 90% of people who meet me, or work with me, have no clue I'm gay (although my gay friends insist I'm flaming) and I DON'T hide the fact. But I also don't push the fact on the tip of my nose. Having worked as a bouncer, being a rather large guy, I guess I just look "str8" (which is itself some sort of stereotype) - at least until I start waving my hands around!!! :)

ps:
Jake: m-boy may or may not like "teddys" [don't know if anyone will get the double pun] :)

AJ: watch your choice of word selection there "bring the beating on" :(

pacefic sweet.

Mr. HCI said...

Have you been to Gay Pride in person, Seth? The TV news always covers just the outrageous. I've not been in a few years but every one I've been to here in Atlanta has been chock full of "regular folks" and a small percentage of outlandish folks. That doesn't make for good TV, of course.

Steevo said...

wow--- what a great discussion.

random thots:

1. If you are OUT you automatically help lessen the stereotype.

2. Stereotypes are like shortcuts or place holders. Str8 folks who do not know a single gay as a friend or family member, use the stereotype until they have a personal experience to replace it with. Rep. Barney Frank (D) MA is one. He lisps. He's gay. He's gray, rumpled, and "hefty". He has huge power in the House. I think SNL did a spoof on him, or some comedian. It was truly funny w/o being cruel or bigoted. It was clever, well written, and the spoof not only made fun of Barney, it also made fun of the auto lords who he was grilling with a very sharp knife.

There are out national network reporters/anchors.

http://www.afterelton.com/people/2006/9/roberts.html?page=0%2C1

The history of Liberace is fascinating. Talk about camp!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liberace

3. Maybe the BEST roll models aren't celebrities. Just regular folks who happen to be gay. Like, a high school teacher!

Mr. HCI said...

I meant to include this before but I forgot. There are straights who cannot accept that we don't all fit stereotypes.

We recently watched a great gay film called Shelter. The protagonist and his love interest were both surfers and neither displayed any sort of mannerisms or speech patterns. As I often do after watching something, I went to see what folks had to say on IMDB.com. Several straight people complained that they didn't accept that the characters were gay 'cause they seemed too much like regular guys.

-----

Speaking of news people, I know he's not officially gay, despite a lot of speculation, but Anderson Cooper is hot!

Brass Matt said...

No, Anderson Cooper is officially gay. he just hasn't said it to the world yet, lol.

Don't worry baby. I wont beat you up - too bad.

Sphynx said...

i am gay. I also own a suzuki b-king motorcycle and a saturn wagon to which i (painstakingly) modified to accommodate a turbocharger. I probably own more guns than you have every seen, two of which accompany me daily. Being gay just means you happen to like guys. It shouldn't change the way you act. I see so many guys who conform unknowingly to this limp-wristed gay stereotype, when its not really who they are. Its just expected.
love
your merkin in shining armour

Anonymous said...

I agree with the general idea behind mirrorboy's post, as well as some of the specifics he stated. I grew up a lower-middle class white kid in the southern US, and I knew that my own personal future included a good education, a good job in a field I liked, someone who I could love and who'd love me back, kids, house, cars, white picket fence, etc., but, I also knew for damn sure I wasn't ever going to be gay. Talk about 'doomed before you start' - I had a crush on the same girl from the 5th grade until graduation, but I only wanted her as a trophy (she was the Vestal Virgin of the school); I had intense, passionate fantasy affairs with all of the admirable boys from the age of ten onward. I've achieved everything that I forecast in my 'future plans' except for the kids and a stable, long-term relationship with a male partner.

While I'm not a youngster anymore, I also haven't given up on my dreams. I've been gifted with four different amazing and wonderful lovers and potential life partners so far in this life. Each of those relationships involved emotional bonding, friendship, love and unbelievable sex, yet each one had to end. The endings played from the exact same script every time - as the lovers would conclude "I love you, more than I've ever loved anyone and more than I expect to love ever again, but I JUST CAN'T BE GAY !!!"

I've learned several of life's lessons the hard way. One of the biggest lessons I'm still learning is that, no matter how much I wish it wasn't so, society's prejudice against gay people is so pervasive and powerful that most people cannot set it aside while living in the real everyday world. So many more than my lost partners and I are affected - parents and their kids, clergy and their parishioners, bosses and their employees; in short, every kind of possible human relationship has the very real possibility to be so affected. This sad prejudice is illogical, founded in ignorange, and so far from the ideals we all claim it's appalling; yet, it is undeniably real and any changes that do occur will happen at a glacial pace.

I believe that society's view of gay people will change only through the continued struggle of brave individuals who choose to take calculated risks on a regular basis to chip away at the ignorance and apathy prevalent in today's western culture. I've learned some basic truths, or ideologies that are so widely held, that I consider them to be facts. These facts guide my daily decisions about the manner I choose to struggle and take risks to overthrow prejudice.

I understand that stereotypes all have their origin in some kernel of truth, however much that beginning may have been twisted over time. Stereotypes in support of prejudices that restrict large numbers of individuals from full and equal particiation in the social contract serve only to dehumanize the victims of the prejudice. Beginning very subtly, the effect of dehumanization separates people, then it criminalizes them, then it turns the victims into entities with no right to exist. Remember Oscar Wilde's prison sentence, lynchings in the south, pink triangles on concentration camp inmates, Matthew Shephard, etc? The saddest part of all this is that gay people have made significant contributions to our own oppression, often unknowing and unwilling, but just as damning, nonetheless.

I find no cause for pride in most of the gay community's "pride" celebrations. Extreme effiminacy in men is a learned behavior, developed to keep an unfriendly world at a safe distance by allowing that world to identify the gay person before they are forced to interact with him. Promiscuity, and the alcohol and drug abuse prevalent among gays are also self-destructive coping mechanisms that help support those that would victimize us. Our over-indulgent acceptance of Judeo-Christian theology, as it has been bastardized over the last two centuries in the west, certainly gives care and comfort to the enemy. Gay activism has been almost a total joke since Stonewall, led by individuals with huge egos and self-serving agendas. Among other things, we've allowed ourselves to believe the activists' rhetoric in the 70s, when told that we gained pride through indiscriminate fucking of multiple partners (only to become known as irresponsible sluts); in the 80s, that we gained pride by martyring ourselves to AIDS causes to 'prove' that it wasn't a gay disease (only to have 'gay' permanently linked with 'AIDS' in all minds); also in the 80s, when we failed to address the child-abuse hysteria sweeping all social institutions in America for fear of being labeled pedophiles (only to be labeled as pedophiles in perpetuity); in the 90s, we gained pride by fighting for equal marriage rights, employment non-discrimination and anonymous testing for STD's by supporting often unelectable candidates or those who reneged on promises once elected, while ignoring the rise of the political power of the religious right (only to watch anti-gay marriage amendments to state constitutions gain popularity, Bill crucified for a BJ, and Dubya installed as POTUS in a stolen election); and in this new century, we have gained pride by rejoicing in a Supreme Court decision that most of us didn't even know about until it was over and supporting various piecemeal initiatives with limited success (while sodomy laws remain on the books in many states, while declaring war on brown people for oil, and while watching our nation's infrastructure crumble); etc., etc., etc.

My experience has shown that gay people are universally smarter, more creative, more spiritual and certainly more compassionate than other people. If we make conscious choices to bring these gifts to bear in our towns, cities, states and countries in display of our committment to stand up for what is right and just in all areas, not only 'gay' issues, then we will have reason for pride. The prejudice that limits gay beople will cease to exist in a world that believes it to be inherently wrong.

Sam said...

Sorry if this offends you but I thought this was hilariously stupid, I heard someone talking about you and he said that all gay people like writing

Anonymous said...

hi m8 just 2 let you know there are some gay men that dont fit the normal gay stereotypes .
take me for instance ok im alot older than you at 40 but had alot of the same problems as you whilst growing up.
but i have now been a butcher(sorry master butcher as we call it here) lol for 20 years and now just about to take my police entry exams, ilike football,do martial arts drink ,smoke and hang out with the lads (all straight).
we all need to live our lives as ourselves and not worry about how other people or groups see us.

Steevo said...

In reply to my first post above.. M-boy sed: "I'm all for acceptance of everyone. What i'm not for, is everyone thinking that all gays are drag queens or such and such because it only makes it worse for us."

Ok. Me too. I have been told over on my blog that I was remiss in my comment to you.

So I hope you understand that I was trying to emphasize that gays can be gay any way they want. That does NOT mean its OK for the big fat drag queen to camp it up at a funeral. Not sure how my anonymous critic got that idea, but this is how blogs work.



I also pointed out that "When we wish there were more "normal" role models, we fall into the very trap you [we!] claim to hate. What's "normal"? Who decides?"

Does that make sense to you? Did you take offense or feel that I was criticizing you as a person rather than expanding a discussion.

If I offended or upset you, I am truly sorry. I re-read the comment and I admit it was a bit pretentious. But in blogs we respond spontaneously. It's informal conversation IMHO.

All better?

hugs...

steevo
.
.

mirrorboy said...

Okay. Dude, i was never angry at you. The only worry that i got from your comment was that i may not have explained myself enough.

Now, i am ALL FOR supporting EVERY gay person, no matter what they are or want to be. I should have clarified that a bit more in my post... I guess you picked me up on that. :P

I'm just saying that we need some different gay figures out there so that we as a community are not typecast anymore.

I hope i make sense... I'm not sure anymore. :P

===>mirrorboy<===

(I value your comments a lot Steevo)

No hard feelings whatsoever. :)

Jeremy said...

I'm not like that either. I am ~90% sure that if we met and you didn't know me, you wouldn't be able to tell that I am gay.

Well unless I walk differently and don't realize it... I'm not sure anymore >.>

I don't know if you even see comments on old posts, but I was bored and reading through them and have left some comments...

hugs
Jeremy