Smile... Laugh... Cry...

Ugh... I think i'm getting all depressed and crap again. I'll try not to bore you with all the details but i don't feel like posting about anything else.

So school is SUCKING MAJORLY right now. By the end of the day i just want to collapse and disappear from this awful world.

I don't want to talk about it, so please don't inundate me with worried emails! I know you all care, and that's really sweet, but i kind of don't want advice from people who don't know the situation. I hope you understand. :/

BUT... i did make an appointment with the counsellor, again. (The previous time was for truancy.) I also talked to my form coordinator about the shit i was dealing with. I know he will do what he can for me, although we don't have and probably never will have a fix-all solution. Unfortunately we both agree that things are going to get worse before they get better and there's not much i can do.


Then i've got French, Journalism, Science and Catering homework to do.

I'm actually cutting one of my classes on Thursday so i can interview a teacher (Miss OC) for the Journalism assignment, which is due on Friday, along with a full feature article about the interview.


There's also the money situation at home. *sighs...

We can't afford much of anything right now. It looks like we'll be waiting a long time before i finally get the internet in my room, along with many other things. :(


Also, because my Mum has to leave early now as she's on placement, my Grandmother comes over EVERY morning and gets me out of bed. She comes in (WITHOUT KNOCKING) opens the door and turns the light on (much earlier than necessary FFS!)

I have things to do in bed before i get up! I don't need her poking around!


I have a headache today as well, (probably due to the stress i bet).


My feet are hurting so bad because i really need new shoes. (Oh look! We can't afford them.) O_O



Sorry. I don't want to burden you with all my shit. I'm not looking for sympathy or anything from you, i just don't have much else to say at the moment.

I put on a smile all day and all night.

Inside i am a sad and scared little mess.



Nobody will pull me out of the mud.

My arms are too tired to pull myself out, for they've been pulling for so long already.

All i can do is wait for the mud to dry.

But it has started raining,

and i'm still expecting the storm.