I'm back. lol. Sleepover was quite boring. :P
Thinking back when i first found and became a part of this online community, it seemed like everyone i knew was happy. There were no huge issues in friends' lives and nobody was doing it tough to the point where they were struggling. Everyone was really nice and making friends around here was easy. Online, i would catch up with some great people regularly, and blogging was fun and easy, and everything was good. Being a part of this all was amazing.
But what's it like now?
Some people i used to talk to every day, i now haven't seen a sign of for weeks or months. Some bloggers that used to update all the time, have disappeared completely and nobody has heard a word from them. People have grown distant to the point where there's no contact at all.
Many of the people that i know are really having a shit time and just holding it together is hard. And for the bloggers that rarely update, it's easy to worry about them. I've met my fair share of creeps and weirdos since coming online. And i've gotten some pretty disturbing emails too.
And worst of all, it seems like some relationships with people i really love are falling apart. Things change, and suddenly your heart is aching because you said something wrong or hurt someone unintentionally, and things may never go back to the way they used to be, when that's all you want.
It's strange, how when i entered the community everything was so great, but as i watched and waited, things have just seemed to have gone downhill, and i can't help but wonder if we will EVER get to the point where everyone is okay, and happy, or if it will be one problem after another forever...
(wishing he could mend some friendships) :(
MB
love.
I'd like to keep this untitled.
14 years ago
15 comments:
What you have said is really strong and smart words. It reminds me on my friends which I meet in high school and the friends which I lose and we went to the elementary school together. I had same problem with my high school friends, but it's just normal, you should be getting used to this. It's just life.
First, in the beginning everyone is amazing, funny, happy, true friends but as the time passes, they are changing, you learn more about them, you get dissapointed, they talk bad about you, they do some bad things to you and simply, you lose them. Or they are just "too busy" and they don't have time for anything else that themselves or whatever they are doing.
But not everything is black. Like this you find out who is really "TRUE" friend, because they won't leave you no matter what. I have few of them and I love them so much, the best friend is the only one who know about me and my bisexuality and/or homosexuality.
Same is with blogs and bloggers and a lot of other things, but like I said not everything is bad, you can even get contact again if you really want. It's not so hard, well at least for me. You should always give people second, third chance etc. If both want to make relationship better, it will be successful.
Now, I maybe wrote about friends in real life, it's totally different with the online friends. I don't like Internet just because of that reason, the friendship over the internet is not the same as the friendship in real life. It can be, but usually it isn't and it's rare. Some mine opinion. But like I said, even I have this opinion, I keep giving people a chance, even a chance to the online friendship :)
I wrote a lot :)))) lol and I hope that you get my point.
Some of this is the way it is irl, too.
Friendships develop and change. Relationships grow. Sometimes they fall apart.
As we get to know each other better we disclose things that we don't tell at first acquaintance.
I feel the way you do about some of the people who have stopped posting. We know that Razz was seriously ill, but others just disappeared, and it would have been nice to have a word of farewell from them.
Unfortunately, there's no way to keep everything good. (That's what happens in heaven.)
So, I understand how you feel about it. Maybe we can remind ourselves to try to be as supportive of one another as we can. But I think a lot of it is just how life goes.
*hugs*
not sure who exactly your talking about but our relationship isnt falling apart. its just your never on msn to talk. we havent talked in 3 weeks. So i guess maybe it is falling apart.
:(
I'm sorry Dusty!
I fucked up!
I LOVE YOU
and the world should know.
*alerts world media
Life is full of ups and downs. And that's how it goes. Maybe you were lucky and caught everyone on an up rather than a down, who knows.
But this circle of bloggers, why do we blog? Because we have some secret or baggage that weighs on our shoulders that we couldn't really say out loud?
There is a way to "fix" things, I believe that. I believe that if you try, some friendships will pull through - the ones that matter.
i've just been alerted to this post by the world media...
like NG says, this is all just human nature sadly, regardless of orientation. if it seemed a lot happier when you 'joined in', maybe you just didn't pick up on the depressing stuff, or maybe things were just on a high part of the cycle then.
perceptions change all the time with online comms too - it's so much more difficult to get a true feeling about ppl than in real life. eg *i* know that i'm one of the good guys (stupendously awesome in fact. lol) and i haven't changed much in the last 4 months but looking back, i cringe a bit that i must have come across as awfully brash in some of my earliest comments to ppl. in a way it's understandable: if A reads B's blog, over time A feels like he knows B really well even though B doesn't even know that A exists.
as for the creepy mails, it just sucks so much that kids your age have to deal with that.
as bystanders we see relationships fall apart, but there's very little we can do other than give sympathy and comfort.
try not to let it get you down. twas ever thus.
torchy!
sorry...
:(
I have a few theories on this, but I wont waste your time. Most of them have been covered by the other people on here.
I will say that I think it's just a cycle in life. Everyone has good times and everyone has bad times. I think it just happens that somehow these bad times for multiple people have happened at the same time.
Also I think when you meet someone you try your hardest to be positive even if life is crappy. Like with you, I had my problems but I didn't let on to it when I met you because I wanted to get to talk to you and I figured if I was negative you wouldn't give me a chance. After like a month of this you finally started talking to me hahaha.
But once you get to know someone and feel comfortable around them, you trust them. You become more vulnerable and you let them know about things bothering you. Which may be why it seems like people are upset all the sudden.
And then theres other people who have no problem telling people their troubles whether they trust them or not. They often tell people they barely know, which i guess is alright if it helps them. But it also puts all their problems on someone who they don't know if they're strong enough to handle their problems.
I guess what I'm saying is everyone gets down. I think things will get better for people, but I think it's like you said before people have to work to make things better. I think too many people just feel sorry for themselves and dont do anything about it. Myself included sometimes.
Alright I'm gonna shut up now, i said it wouldnt be long and i lied. So I don't blame you if you dont read this.
But I do miss you mboy. Hopefully we can talk soon, i really miss hearing how you are and stuff.
Loves you...
-C
I don't know what things are like in OZ, Mboy, but in the States the serious downturn in the economy has a lot of people worrying about things other than blogging, and they're not too happy right now. Don't be surprised if things don't pick up until the end of the year.
OK guys.
Some of us ARE happy and enjoying making friends we value, enjoying having squillions of people reading our blogs (or does giggle tell porkies? Oh really, it does?)
But some of us are still happy and making friends. Some folk are tied in knots because their religious beliefs conflict with their gay ones. Some people think everyone older than they wants to get inside their pants.
Some people just like writing longer comments than U write posts!
Don't forget among everything else, these dark times or whatever it is never last. It seems to be the depression and pain etc goes in cycles around here, and we always come around in the end.
As for people losing contact, I don't know what to say. Yes, it hurts...it hurts a lot. It hurts even more when we know they're choosing not to speak with us. But that's the way things go sometimes...we just have to learn to live with the fact that some friends won't always be friends forever.
If the person does return, though, we should welcome them with open arms. And there is always that hope of returning.
MBoy, in my non-professional opinion, whhat your experiencing out here in blogland is life. It is moving all of us along at varying rates and we each have different and unique situations that develop at different times that will either bring us together or push us apart. My goal is just to continue to try and be the best friend that I can be, wether it be good times or bad times. Your Friend Always, Jayson
D:
Planet Venus has been retrograde for over a month - it's direct again now, things should improve. For example, last week a friend spoke bad about me, then another friend took him on. I was summoned to reconcile them. My defendant almost hit me for suggesting he might have too simplistic a view of right and wrong. It is a joke but one can't dare to laugh - if the other guys are stronger.
mboy
time marches on and people will come into and out of your life like bus boys in a restaurant. Some will be more memorable than others and a few you may know forever but enjoy the time you have with each
thank you btw for enduring the creeps and weirdos and the emails
i hope none were from me :)
unfortuntely life is a series of problems one after another but that is ok and manangible especially with support from freinds. And when you entered the community these problems were there below the surface it just has taken time for them to bubble up
hope things settle down and it would be better if things improved for all
take care and be safe
bob
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