Thursday, December 18, 2008

A Recipe for the Perfect Pet.

Start with an abundance of alertness from an antelope,
Add in a bang of benevolence from a butterfly,
A cup of cuteness from a cat,
And a dash of dazzle from a daddy long-legs.

Ease in an eccentric amount of egotism from an eagle,
A fibre of fanciness from a flamingo,
A gallon of glory from a gazelle,
And a big helping of happiness from a hippopotamus.

Immerse your ideal amount of impulsiveness from an Irish Wolfhound,
A jumble of joy from a joey,
A kilo of kindness from a koala,
And a lash of lavishness from a ladybird.

Mix in a mad amount of magnificence from a manta ray,
A naughty quantity of naughtiness from a numbat,
An obscene amount of obsequiousness from an octopus,
And a pinch of positivity from a peacock.

Quarter and mix in a quart of quality from a queen bee,
A ration of razzamatazz from a red-back spider,
A sprinkle of sympathy from a sloth,
And a teaspoon of temperance from a turtle.

Use an unusual amount of uncanniness from a unicorn,
A verse of vocals from a vulture,
A whack of wisdom from a wolf,
And an excess of extravagance from an axolotl.

Then, with a year’s-worth of youth from a yeti,
the zest of zaniness from a zebu,
and a little bit of love from you,
you will have your own perfect pet.

Mirrorboy tries some sort of poetry. :)

Meanwhile... I've gotta think of some sort of special post for tonight... because Mirrorboy's Blog just got 75,000 views!

Catch ya later.


Zee said...

Awww...that was an adorable poem!

naturgesetz said...

Nicely done!

(Of course you and I both know all you need is a cat. lol)

Peter said...

Great poem!!

75,000 views!!! That's only a few more than I have LOL.

Anonymous said...

maybe "a heaping helping"??

Mr. HCI said...

I submitted this poem to a bogus poetry contest several years ago. They loved it and said they would publish it an upcoming collection. They suggested I pre-order a copy, though, to ensure publication.


My Mere Bits of Shame

Fish drop from the sky
In an angry flow
Of blood-stained
And My
Body is eaten away
By the foul stench
Of their teeth

75K hits! Hot damn! Congratulations!!!

Planetx_123 said...

You better not hope for more than just a sprinkle of sympathy from a sloth...they are notorious for being particularly unsympathetic...bastards :-D

Cute poem... I loved the vivacious verbosity of your venerable, yet vacuous, volumes of alliteration.

Much Love,

Seth said...

Well, you kind of cheated on letter "X" but thats so cool!!

Congratulations on your tally!! You deserve every visitor.


ps: mrHCI remind me never to go fishing with you...


Mr. HCI said...

That was the nice one, Seth!

As a followup, I sent one that went something like this (have a printout but don't know where it is right now):


When you smile
It makes the world a little bit brighter
But when you frown
It brings me down
So I'm going to beat the shit out of you

They loved that one, too! They even suggested I get a cassette recording made of someone reading it with baroque music in the background for only $39.99!

Since they didn't mind the cussing, I sent this one, though I don't recall the title:

Fuck shit
Fuck shit up
I like to fuck shit up
And stab you in the neck
With a screwdriver

Oddly enough, they did not respond to that poem.