Friday, July 17, 2009

Crap Week.

I've been a bit down this week... Well more than a 'bit' down actually. I think i've had shit coming at me from all directions and it has broken through my defenses. My nights are quite sad. My days are quite stressful. The bad mood only brings with it more bad thoughts about myself, which add to the problem. As the weekend approaches i can only hope that the new week brings with it some solutions and a happier frame of mind.

Sorry i guess i'm not making much sense. :P

I've identified with my psychologists that when i'm happier i feel better about myself. When i'm in a worse mood, i see myself in a worse light. When i looked in the mirror this morning i definitely didn't like what i saw (probably due to my worse self-image because i was having a bad time), which resulted in me having a pretty crap day (and making things worse). It snowballs, until something breaks the reaction.

Things had better start getting better around here soon.

Sorry to those owners of blogs that i haven't kept up with recently. I'll try to have a read during the weekend when i get time. Also sorry that i haven't posted to my Words Blog (not that anybody noticed/cares). Each post takes a huge amount of effort and i don't receive as much feedback as i'd like (which is the reason i post) to make it worth it. I usually have to beg.

Anyways i'll shut up now.

love

26 comments:

WkBoy714 said...

Yeah I where you're coming from with the 'snowballing' thing.

I'm sure I speak for other bloggers when I say we are here to support you, and it's fine if you want to vent yourself in any way on here. Very hope things improve for you. It can seem bad if you do into that depressed mode but, ofcourse once you come out you remember how good things can be :)

Sorry my advice, it's not so good, I hope you can cheer up pretty soon and you feel more like that cute and fun Mboy that everyone knows and loves :P

Tombi04 said...

*hugs*

Love you sweetie.

jlo said...

Sorry you are having such a bad week. I enjoy reading this blog and want you to know how much you are loved and appreciated love and hugs

Kevin Wilson said...

I certainly understand how your days could be stressful considering the things you have to deal with, but you say that your nights are quite sad - why is that? I would have thought that a lot of your online support network would be around during our night time hours.

When things overwhelm me, I find that a good yell or argument makes me feel better about things - something that gives me the opportunity to let off some steam. Somehow I doubt you are the type to want to get int an argument so I think that you can use your nightly running to do this - surely it would be a good chance to think things over.

Louie said...

Hey, I asked about your Univ. story a couple things now. And I don't know about anyone else, but I still want to know what happens to Coltrane! I hope you feel better soon. If you need to talk to anyone, well, I hope you know that you can always come to me when your feeling down. :D *hugs*

~Louie

AJCon89 said...

I am sorry for not being there for you this week... I feel like a douche for it... and I am sorry for just disappearing...

I am so sorry you are having a rough time buddy... I wish I could be there to give you a massive hug... you really need and deserve one...

Anyways... I love you buddy...

Peace,
AJ

Col said...

I hope things start getting better real soon buddy!

Sorry I don't give you any real feedback on your Words blog, but I'm no expert so I leave it to others to do that. I do, however, leave you words of encouragement (or something. lol) so that you know I've read it and that I appreciate the amount of effort/time that you've put into it. I'm sure others feels the same way. :)

Hope you *do* have a great weekend to help you start off the new week on a good note!

Take care,
Col
*love & hugs*

Aek said...

Awww, Mboy. I know how you feel. It can be tough. But try to keep your head up and look for the small things that perk you up - like that gay group thing.

I hope things get better soon. *Hugs*

Tom said...

Mirrorboy i just wanna say WkBoy714 seems to have stolen my entire mind at the moment. It's as if he is in my head. So to save teh dtree of reading it twice, Ditto the above WkBoy714 comment.

You kmow where we are

Forsaken03 said...

Oh noes =(, Crap weeks suck. But it happens to all of us, and just remember no matter what theres always atleast two people that love you with all there heart. Its a proven fact :)

And i don't think theres much i can do :\. but if theres anything i can do to help: Just tell me!

Tyler 綽

James said...

I hope the bad cycle breaks very soon and you can get on to a good cycle of thinking.

*hugs*!

cvn70 said...

mboy

you are making sense and i wish i had a way to help you see a better you in the mirror. All i know is teh you in this blog and on MSN and that you has quality and character, a sense of humour and fun, a sense of caring and strenght.

I wish your physcologists could help you see that those things i see in you and project them into the world. It's in you buddy believe that about your self, just got to find a way to let it out.

i hope you find something to focus on that breaks that snow ball

take care and be safe my friend

bob

Mr McCabbage said...

Um .. try Terry Barber with John Dowland's FLOW MY TEARS, from 1596:

Flow, my tears, fall from your springs!
Exiled for ever, let me mourn;
Where night's black bird her sad infamy sings,
There let me live forlorn.

Down vain lights, shine you no more!
No nights are dark enough for those
That in despair their lost fortunes deplore.
Light doth but shame disclose.

Never may my woes be relieved,
Since pity is fled;
And tears and sighs and groans my weary days
Of all joys have deprived.

From the highest spire of contentment
My fortune is thrown;
And fear and grief and pain for my deserts
Are my hopes, since hope is gone.

Hark! you shadows that in darkness dwell,
Learn to condemn light
Happy, happy they that in hell
Feel not the world's despite.

Jeremy said...

I love your words posts though! You have to finish your book soon so I can go ahead and buy it :D

I hope you manage to cheer up.. play pokemon for me :)

*hugs*

Seth said...

*hug*

Landyn said...

i love you man, you know that I'm always here if you need anything.

you're one of the main reasons why ive gotten through a lot of tough times, so hang in there and I know that things (however bad) will get better...even though that seems like little comfort.

i loves ya a lots.

Landyn <3

Anonymous said...

I don't know where I first heard this, and at the time it sounded like a pile of crap.

"When it's all over, everything will be okay. If everything's not okay, then it isn't over."

Now, I know it's the truth.

I love you, MBoy, so much. That's why I showed you the photos; I love you, and I trust you, and that's what I can offer you. My love and trust. You are so brilliant, so special, and such a good friend.

I've been standing exactly where you are now before, and I know nothing feels like it'll get any better.

But come on, take my hand, and we'll head back to the light together.

All my love.

Who know who this is...

andy89 said...

Aww, I'm only a new reader of your blog but I do hope you feel better and cheer up a bit.
We all have our good times and our bad, without the bad times we wouldn't be able go appreciate how special the good times are, we just have to hold out for the good to come.

I hope things turn around for you soon.

- Andy

Mirrorboy said...

Thanks y'all.

<3

Key said...

When things get me down I just go to sleep. Its always better in the morning.

Hope ya feel ok :)

Brett said...

You're amazing (at least I think so), don't forget that. I don't think I could even begin to share as much as you do on here.

Often, just reading your posts cheers me up.
Feel better =].

Brett.

AGENTK007 said...

wow wish u had said sumthin. let me help. SUPERCUDDLES. but yeah i get y u dont. same y i dont wana dump my stuff on u. cause i care to much an u help so many that i cant bring u more sadness. u help so many an are such a caring an sensitive guy that u become vulnerable to bein hurt by stuff.
i just wana say i feel for u. an i hope ur feelin betr soon. think happy thughts. it mite evn make u fly like peterpan or the othr lost boys. But happy thughts makes u feel happy.
positive thinkin...LOL
HUGS
<3 Kay

torchy! said...

life sucks sometimes. it's natural. i know it hurts when you're down there, but when you're at the bottom, the only direction is up.

we're all here for you and feel your pain. it will pass.

torchy!

Jason Carwin said...

Aww. I hope you start to feel better soon. I know what you feel like, as I was in a similar state for 1 whole year. It was a really rough year. I remember thinking, "I just want to go home," even though I was at home. I guess in that sense I was without a home. I had nowhere to belong to.

Planetx_123 said...

I know Im behind commenting in blogworld, but I just wanted to say I hope that this week is better-- and I really like your words blog. I think I've commented on all of them (maybe but one).

Anyways-- much love and big hugs

Steve

naturgesetz said...

Hope this week is going better and you're feeling better now.