Friday, March 6, 2009

Psychologist Fun Times.

*EDIT: They're psychologists, not psychiatrists. Sorry. :/*

So i went to see 2 psychologists today with my Mum. fun fun

It's nothing bad, in fact it's good, i think.

I need help in how i'm dealing with the crap i have to go through. They're going to help me with my anxiousness and coping with stress, and how i feel about myself etc.

With a bit of help i might feel better about myself and things said/done to me won't affect me so much. I might not get so stressed and anxious and have such trouble facing the day, every day.

It'll take a few weeks to make any progress cos i'm going to go for another appointment in a week by myself, and then they're going to do one with my Mum, and then another with the both of us again, before they give me some strategies.

Anyways, wish me luck. I'm a bit of a mess in life. lol

At least you can't say i've given up. :)

I'll try to get around to posting something on my other blog sometime this weekend. I've just gotta figure out what to post first. I could either start with explaining the story, or why i write, or talking about characters, or i could just start by posting a few random excerpts that i like... I dunno.

Anyways, i'm gonna have an early, relaxing night in my room watching TV.



PoisonedHappiness said...

You are one of the strongest people I know, help is always good and you will do fine. I don't know what kids do to you at school but it's good you are not giving up.

Oh, and I'd love to read excerpts from your writing. I am curious about you style.

Mr. HCI said...

Good for you! I'm sure you'll benefit.

cvn70 said...


getting some help is neer a bad thing and talking ot poeple well you know how good that can be.

Just work with them and be proud of who you are. And time you have time on your side. Mum is so great for going with you also do not forget to give her a hug.

One thing i know its not you who is a bit of a mess, it is what society is doing to you and ther is a difference

today song was a bit hauanting but nice. LUCK

take care and be safe


Jake Annonymous said...

I hate psychiatrists, not only did mine talk to me like i was a little kid, but didn't even once ask me how something made me feel lol

She failed at being a psychiatrist.

Im proud of you love

Anonymous said...

Just don't take their pills! It can cause ME / Chronic Fatigue (and much besides) instead of helping against it. Most psychiatrists need your help, not you theirs. True your essence cannot be damaged, but psycho pills are sure to partly disable it. The effects will last long, perhaps a lifetime. I took various such pills but stopped every time due to side effects. Later a psychic healer asked me what serious shocks my aura had around certain dates - corresponding to the times I took those pills. Best to trust only one's own essence, accepting the tedious trials it puts one through - perfectly designed to make you as magnificent as your cats. Please get "Hands of Light: A guide to healing through the human energy field" by Barbara Brennan. You won't regret doing that book.

Anonymous said...

that's what they always say. Well make you bully proof, help you deal with it. But they won't cos they can't change you or who you are. You'll be another unsolved probelm, a bi kid gone wrong. But at least they'll listen, as long as you pay for it. X

AJCon89 said...

I am so proud of you buddy...

Hopefully this should really help you...

and please, please, please dont listen to what that guy said about medication...

I dont always go into this type of stuff on my blog... but I take a few pills from my doc and they really help... a lot.

Sure sometimes it takes some time to find the right ones and you will get sideeffects from the wrong one (each person is different and medications react differently to each of us - so if it isnt right tell them asap... dont wait) but once you find the right one(s), it can change your life.

If it werent for them then I would just be an angry, depressed guy who goes into rages at times...

It has made my life livable...

Anyway... I am soooooooooo proud of you.

Love you.


AJCon89 said...

Oh and dont listen to what the other guy said about shrinks in general...

cause that couldnt be further from the truth...

Pam has been a huge help to me.

She has helped me see things from different angles and changed my outlook on life...

Truth is... in therapy you only get back what you put in. If you go in there and work hard on your issues then you can come out a changed man... but if you just go in there and BS (like I did for so many years) they wont be be to help you.

Just be honest with them and realize that they wont judge you... what you think is fucked up is probably the most normal thing they are dealing with... just lay it all out on the table and dont hold back...

if you do that... then as long as that shrink isnt a complete incompetent ass... they will be able to help you.

PoisonedHappiness said...

Geez guys, why you are assuming that he will need any pills? I rather think more that he will get help from psychologist, for someone who will help him dealing with problems he is facing. He don't need any fuckin' pills! Just someone who will give him ideas, possible solutions and answers.

AJ, I understand that maybe you need taking some pills because of some reasons, but imo it's last thing that should be taken into consideration. Mboy need psychologist, someone qualified to talk to who will look at him and his problems from more educated side, more professional. And from what I read this is psychological help he is getting.

Mirrorboy said...

There has been no talk of pills. I won't be taking any pills! :P

This is just a way to give me some strategies to help me deal with my problems.

naturgesetz said...

You're doing well to go to the psychiatrist. It sounds as if the expectation is that it will be short term. But however that may be, if they psychiatrist can help to avoid getting too stressed by what other people say and do, that will be a great thing. I hope you get some good insights.

(And I agree with AJ about pills and psychiatrists. They probs won't be suggesting pills, but if they do, it's worth trying them to see if they help. You get to decide if they are helping you and if there are side effects which are worse than the cure. But as you say, it doesn't sound like it's gonna happen anyway.)

It's great that you're continuing to work on it. You won't cure everybody's prejudices, but you can refuse to let them get to you.


AJCon89 said...

I wasnt saying he should go get some meds... Just that he shouldnt listen to people who just trash meds... Because they help tons of people and if its suggested then you should not go into it with a prejudice that they wont work...

Thats all I am trying to say...

Wow... Three comments on one post.. lol

J said...

Mboy, listen to AJ. If pills are prescribed their effect is likely to be quite subtle and unobtrusive, and they're all kinds of anti-depressives out there. They can find you one that is the right fit. If your difficulty is situational only, a talk therapy will suffice, or a combination of the two.
It sounds as if Jake and Anonymous had bad experiences with quacks, or therapists who want to string you out with endless appointments for talk therapy. Believe me, the old styled Freudian analyst with his couch is passe. The key is to get one with whom you feel comfortable, who is also up on his psychopharmacology, and you will know if he's OK pretty soon.
Please keep an open mind about this process.
You might note that Landyn is seeing a doctor, so you guys may be in the same boat. What none of your readers wants to hear is that either of you went into a decline and harmed himself, and from some of your posts the danger was clearly out there. Its not easy being young and gay (what a misnomer!), and it is important to all of us that you succeed in these endeavors.

Seth said...

Wow this one brought out alot of argumentative comments from people.

First off - you went to TWO psychiatrists? Are they a team, or two seperate visits? I was a bit confused on that point.

Generally speaking, here in the USA at least, you see a psychiatrist for medication (since they are MDs). Unless you're rich and can afford to pay them 400 dollars an hour LOL, you usually see them like once a month after they get you stabilized on meds.

You would normally see a psychologist, a counselor, or even an LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker) for regular - ie:weekly - sessions of "therapy", whether or not you have any meds as well. Thats the "seeing a shrink" part of it.

Now, notice I did not say you NEED medications. In fact, you probably don't (theres MY opionion - leave 400 dollars with my secretary on the way out mmkay) need them. There ARE some very good medications out there, that help people deal with all sorts of emotional issues (aka mental stuff) for all sorts of reasons. Obviously the big trendy thing is "depression". But also other serious issues such as Bipolar disorder. etc.

However, (after years of dealing with therapy and meds) I do think its much better to start by seeing someone for some weekly counseling. You can address some of the issues you have in life, and determine if you even need meds. (Again, just from what I know of you, you are having "social" issues, not necessarily a medical component such as depression, etc). A good therapist, as you mentioned, can give you help and advice in coping with life each day.

FINDING a good mental health worker (of whatever variety) is difficult. Just as difficult as finding a good medication - it takes trial-and-error. You have to meet with them, and see how YOU feel about them, how you interact, etc. DON'T be afraid to say "this guy is not right for me" - no one should be forcing you to visit a specific doctor, and I hope you Mom understands that. If they are not right, don't continue going - start looking for another one. (Of course, don't just go ONCE and say oh I hate this, this is not the right person, they suck) - you do have to feel it out for a couple sessions.

As you stated, they should be giving you STRATEGIES for coping with things. Methods of making yourself feel better emotionally, mentally stronger. Ways to deal with the stress and anxiety, defuse situations, keep your head high, etc etc. No therapist can "cure" you of anything - and if they claim they can in 4 sessions, they are total quacks. (Of course, they also should not be keeping you in therapy for the next 12 years) - if you aren't making some "progress" in 3-6 months, start looking again.

A good therapist will make YOU realize things about YOU. They will help you see things in a new light. Nothing religious, but you should at some point, have even a small "revelation" about something. Thats a hallmark that they are pretty good. They will also find a way of helping you help yourself to deal with situations.

Adolescent and child psychiatrits seem to want to go slowly. I remember my first therapist, when I was very young, because I was not "socializing normally" wanted to play board games and go outside for walks to toss a football around. I was young, but I wasn't a stupid child, and I didn't need him to play dad or buddy for me. Needless to say, it didn't do much. YOU are quite mature for your age, obviously an intelligent person - be sure you communicate that with them. Say "i've never done this before, but I don't want to waste time i want to get something out of this".

Don't be embarassed about going. Its only a good thing. If you had a broken leg, you'd have to go get it fixed right? So just think of this as a cast for your psyche, which makes you stronger.

Don't worry about medications. It is true that doctors these days hand them out like candy. Tell them you want to try talking and therapy first, not just let them railroad you into "oh he's depressed have some prozac and call me in a month" routine. On the other hand, if you do feel things like heavy anxiety, or depression - ASK them about it. They should be able to work with you to (clinically) identify the symptoms, and whether or not you do need medication at all.

So, give them a chance, see what develops and what they have to say, share some of it with us, if you want, your readers have been through this sort of stuff and can give you advice to consider.

*hugs* and best wishes

Seth said...

@ Anonymous: you have no idea what the hell you are talking about. You don't even sound logical.

I've never heard of any pscyhotropic medication ("psycho pills") --causing-- CFS. Nothing in any literature suggests that, in fact the exact opposite, that depression could be a factor IN the symptoms of CFS, and medication might help. My mom has variously been diagnosed with this syndrome.

Anyway, mirrorboy doesn't have CFS or anything like it - he probably doesn't have any emotional condition at all - other than some nasty-ass bullies and the stresses any teenager goes through. M-boy is sensitive (and I mean that in a good way).

Psychics and essences. Bah.

Next thing, mirrorboy, you should wrap your head in aluminum foil. THAT will make you bully-proof.


Deadwing said...

I'm proud of you buddy! That is a big step. I hope you benefit from the experience. Good luck!

Oh yeah, good song today. :)

Anonymous said...

Sweetheart, the day we aren't all a little messed up is the day we'll all be in a heavenly paradise. You know you are in good company, and you know that we are all here wanting what's best for your health all around. *hugs*

Mirrorboy said...


Fuckin hell. Calm down. lol

I didn't think there would be such a huge reaction.

Okay, the youth worker who i saw a couple of weeks ago recommended coming here because it would be useful in helping me deal with how i cope.

That's it! That's all!

There are 2 women because 'they can put their heads together'. They'll be talking to me and my Mum together and seperately for a few weeks. Then giving me some advice.

This reminds me of the time i was talking about Barack Obama, and then everyone started arguing about abortion. -_-

I wish some of you wouldn't be so sceptical because of your own experiences. :/

torchy! said...

well i think it's great that you're going to see these laydies. sounds like you're like i was as a teenager - my parents said i had a 'sensitive disposition'. hopefully the experts will give you the tools to deal with the challenges you face.
and when you get them, perhaps you could share them with us - i could do with knowing how i'm sposed to react when i next have a dream about being back at school. [no lol here]


PoisonedHappiness said...

One wrong word and Mboy caused small storm :P

Landyn said...

good for you man, sounds like you are doing what I'm gonna do. I just got the number to a psychologist and Im gonna see her in the next few weeks I think :) Im happy that you are taking this step man, only good can come from it.

You deserve all the happiness in the world.


Steevo said...

bottom line: Depression is a neurochemical [brain chemistry] reaction to stress which MB has shit loads of.

There are several very mild anti-depressants that act in very subtle ways that have been around for longer than MB!!! I neither promote nor disapprove of medications to promote mental health. It all depends. MB, u know what u want and u have a good brain to evaluate suggestions.

You and a therapist have to sorta click to get best results, but the answers r inside YOU. A good therapist helps u find them for yourself. She does not FIX you.

Like AF says, keep an open mind. There is no shame in having a mental health problem. If you went thru what u have and had no issues as a result, I'd tend to think you were not so bright!!!

And yes, smart, talented, creative, sensitive PEOPLE tend to have more mental health "issues". It is how we are wired.

I have a fancy PDA to use at work!!! Lunchtime is over.

Back to the students who also need me!

I just had to chime in asap.

steevo [no time to edit]